My Grandma used to tell me, when I was a little boy, that “we” (our family) are Cardinal fans. She used to say it like someone would tell their grandchild that he or she is Italian or German. It’s in the blood and there is nothing you can do about it. And so it has remained. Now I talk to my own daughters that same way. We are Cardinal people. However, Grandma always used to say something else. She’d say, “It’s ok to root for the Cubs... as long as they aren’t playing the Cardinals.” So now that the Cardinals’ season is over, I’m rooting for the Cubbies. Go Cubs Go! And being a country-music singer, I tried to put together in my fuzzy brain how country music could potentially help the Cubs win it all. Here’s what I came up with…
“Flushed From The Bathroom Of Your Heart” - Johnny Cash
Cub fans and Johnny Cash have historically had a lot in common. Tortured souls who know better, but who are constantly drawn back to the darkness. Cub fans and Johnny Cash have been the ultimate masochists, but those days are gone. Johnny has gone on to meet his maker with grace, and the curse of the billy goat has been broken. The light has shone down upon thee. The long wait is finally over. So let the past be the past. Do as the Man In Black says, and flush it from the bathroom of your hearts.
“Six Ways To Sunday” - Blackberry Smoke
I have never met more dedicated fans than Cubby fans, except the fans of a particular little band out of Atlanta Georgia by the name of Blackberry Smoke. (I know this because I am one.) Psychotic doesn’t begin to get it, and that’s just fine with the hundreds of thousands rednecks, hippies, cowboys, kickers, truckers, angels, bikers, strippers and cotton pickers. They/We call ourselves “Brothers And Sisters”, and for the most part, it’s a big ol’ family. So I’m thinking that BBS fans would make natural Cub fans. The level of dedication they exhibit is second to none. And I would venture to guess that there are a shit-ton of Blackberry Smoke fans up in Chicago who are also Cubby Fans. So lean on your fans, pull up some Smoke on the jukebox, and feel the love and let them take you all the way home to the promised land. (White Sox fans stay out of this...)
“It’s a Great Day To Be Alive” - Travis Tritt
Good ol’ Travis Tritt took this Darryl Scott song all the way to number 1 back a few years ago, and it remains one of the greatest sing along songs to ever come out of country music. It’s our “Sweet Caroline” or “Brown Eyed Girl”, if you will. It talks about all American things like fu-man-chu’s, howling at the moon, Harley’s, homemade soup, and getting tattoos. It’s a great big middle finger to the blues. So Cubbies and Cub fans, when you feel yourself getting down, just pop this golden nugget into the CD player and sing your lungs out. You’ll feel better.
"If You're Going Through Hell" - Rodney Atkins
The playoffs are hell. No doubt about it. So you’re all in hell right now. Just follow the instructions laid out by Mr. Rodney Atkins here and you might just get out of hell before the devil knows you’re dead.
“Whiskey” - Every country singer there ever was...
There is a veritable shit-ton of country songs about Whiskey. Whether you’re “Whiskey Bent And Hell Bound”, you’re drinking “Dark Whiskey”, making whiskey (“White Lightning”), or just talking a little geography (“Tennessee Whiskey” / “Whiskey River”). Maybe you’re just trying to trying to get some damn sleep (“Whiskey Lullaby”). Maybe “The Whiskey Ain’t Working Anymore”, or maybe the “Whiskey’s Gone”, maybe there’s “Whiskey In My Water”, or maybe he or she just “Ain’t Worth The Whiskey”. Whiskey is the ultimate go-to tool in the country toolbox of life for fixing any situation. So Cubbies, if you find yourself down a game or two, just hit the bottle and forget about it, and the next day you’ll be right as rain. And if you do manage to win the whole damn thing, Whiskey will help you do a bunch of stupid shiz that will forever taint the memory of the sweet victory, or completely wipe your memory clean all together. It’s a win-win.
“Someday We’ll Go All The Way”
I am indeed a hardcore, dyed in the wool Cardinal fan, BUT! I cannot watch the YouTube video of Eddie Vedder’s acoustic version of this song without tearing up. It gets me every single damn time. I find myself wishing STL had a curse to overcome, haha.
I know the curse is broken and the Cubs have gone all the way, but this song still rocks and it speaks to everything great about baseball and Americana. It’s also a waltz, a time-signature completely forgotten by nearly every genre of music, except....you guessed it...Country Music. So I hereby claim this song for country music. If you don’t like that then F-you, you Jagoffs ;)
If you need a little inspiration just put this song on the speakers and let it get your blood up to a boil. Works like a charm everytime.
Holy Cow, So that’s it. I hope I’ve done my part to make history happen again. In the Immortal words of Harry Caray: "Booze, broads, and bullshit. If you got all that, what else do you need?" Being from the Midwest, more accurately, Illinois, we’ve got plenty of booze and broads. Now I’ve provided the bullshit, and that should be enough magic to make anything happen. Go Cubs Go!